THE INTERNET SONG
by
Jarmo
(To the tune of
Monty Python's "Galaxy Song", with apologies to Eric Idle.)
[Intro]
When your screen goes blue, Mr Pugh,
After a Windows crash,
If your PC seems pointless or even possessed
And you feel you might do something rash...
[Verse 1]
Just remember that you're tapping on an ergonomic keyboard
At a mediocre 30 words a min,
That's connected to a desktop PC system
(We've all dissed 'em)
By a cable with a six-pin mini-DIN.
The buttons that you click
Are all converted in a tick
Into subatomic, electronic bursts,
That are processed at a cool one thousand million a second
By a chip running at just one gigahertz.
[Verse 2]
The CPU itself, though just a centimetre thick,
Squeezes millions of transistors side by side
On slim silicon wafers,
A bit like Rizla papers,
Only less that nought-point-one-five microns wide.
The power of your machine is several thousand times more keen
Than the kit aboard an early Concorde jet,
And your PC's only one among the millions and billions
Of computers on the worldwide Internet.
[Verse 3]
The Internet itself keeps on expanding and expanding
As people all around the world connect:
A vast repository of all we think and do and see,
Building mutual understanding and respect.
So remember when computers make you cry out in despair
That you've really got no cause to be forlorn;
While the boot-up routine's runnin'
Why not get a sticky bun in,
Then get back to gossip, games and hardcore porn.
(c) Jarmo, 2002 - www.headpaste.com
Listen to Jarmo sing "The Internet Song" (somewhat out of key!): download MP3 (approx 2Mb)
<< BACK TO HEADPASTE HOME PAGE <<
When your screen goes blue, Mr Pugh,
After a Windows crash,
If your PC seems pointless or even possessed
And you feel you might do something rash...
[Verse 1]
Just remember that you're tapping on an ergonomic keyboard
At a mediocre 30 words a min,
That's connected to a desktop PC system
(We've all dissed 'em)
By a cable with a six-pin mini-DIN.
The buttons that you click
Are all converted in a tick
Into subatomic, electronic bursts,
That are processed at a cool one thousand million a second
By a chip running at just one gigahertz.
[Verse 2]
The CPU itself, though just a centimetre thick,
Squeezes millions of transistors side by side
On slim silicon wafers,
A bit like Rizla papers,
Only less that nought-point-one-five microns wide.
The power of your machine is several thousand times more keen
Than the kit aboard an early Concorde jet,
And your PC's only one among the millions and billions
Of computers on the worldwide Internet.
[Verse 3]
The Internet itself keeps on expanding and expanding
As people all around the world connect:
A vast repository of all we think and do and see,
Building mutual understanding and respect.
So remember when computers make you cry out in despair
That you've really got no cause to be forlorn;
While the boot-up routine's runnin'
Why not get a sticky bun in,
Then get back to gossip, games and hardcore porn.
(c) Jarmo, 2002 - www.headpaste.com
Listen to Jarmo sing "The Internet Song" (somewhat out of key!): download MP3 (approx 2Mb)
<< BACK TO HEADPASTE HOME PAGE <<